Hey, I need to ask you something and I hope you'll be honest with me.
Hi. Um, okay. Ask away, I guess.
Are the two of you trying to play some kind of game? She's my friend, and she's vulnerable, and I don't want to see her hurt.
Yeah, I don't know what this is about, but if I have to protect her from you both, I will.
I don't think I really understand. Why would I have anything to do with all this? I don't know what to do about it. I hope it's just talk, that they do, and that it will stop soon. She seems like she's hunting him, to me.
It's not like that. She's not the one doing the hunting.
Well then, I don't know what I should be doing, whether I need to go away from the forum, so I'm not there, maybe I was never welcome, I just thought it was a friendly place.
i woke to find a party
going on inside my mind
there are strangers there;
people i’ve never met
spilling ashes on my clean thoughts,
with my collection of emotions.
i didn’t invite you in,
how dare you crash my head?
i am proud of my heirloom sensibilities.
i polish them daily, and freely
give them as gifts;
you had no right
to come in and rearrange them
to suit your own taste
I'm glad you stayed. It'll be okay. Maybe it won't last. I don't see how you're okay with this, though.
I'm not okay with it. I just thought I should kind of fight, by staying and being a name she sees there. Now he's planning to visit her. I don't know what to do.
Has he done this before?
Oh, no! At least, I never thought so.
Your vacation photos look spectacular. I've never been to the other side of the lake.
Did he visit her?
Yes, and I could smell her scent in the car. She could smell my scent in the car. Now he says he won't see her again, that she's kinda crazy. I always thought so. I know she's your friend.
No, I understand. And she and I haven't spoken in a long time.
I won the race in my age category. Would you like to see a picture?
I'd love to! I feel honored.
Here you go, let me know when you can see it.
Wow. You look—really great.
You like that?
I sure do! I mean, well, it's good that you work so hard at staying fit.
I'm 38 years old, takes more of an effort these days, but it's worth it. Would you like to see more?
Do you really believe everything your church says to believe in?
Well, I believe in what I always knew was real. Lately I think what I always thought everyone else believed was something different from reality, that is, the truth underneath all the things they say. I thought their details were just condiments or something, and underneath it all we got the same thing. But maybe not.
I think you're too smart to believe in something so small.
I think that if I could grasp it, it would be huge, and encompass everything ever.
But only if it's real. You can learn about the hugeness of the world, though, either way.
I'm glad we're friends, even though we weren't in the beginning.
I'm glad, too.
This might not be okay to ask, but do you think you could call me and we could talk on the phone?
Well, I guess I could, is everyone okay, did something happen?
No, everyone's fine, I just, if you could call me
Hello? What is it? Are you okay?
You know he promised he was done with her. We made up, and went camping.
Yes, though I don't know if I think you should trust him.
I know you don't. But now I'm going to have a baby.
How is it he never saw a doctor about that?
Well, he always refused. And now, maybe this will be okay. I hope I'm okay, though. I've been through this too many times, I think.
I hope so, too. I think he's a bastard, but if you love him, well, maybe you can be happy.
You shouldn't. He should be, though.
I really like your voice. A lot.
I really like yours, too. Please take care of yourself.
screaming with frustration,
my inner self is out of control
as the outer shell strains
in an effort to remain calm.
I can feel the conflict, though-
it burns on my skin.
It begs to be scrubbed away,
Released from bondage.